I think your reply feels like what I got from the piece;
Effort would be the extra strength applied past what is needed to get a reasonable grip. It is “effort” when you squeeze hard enough to bend the lid.
I see other comments talking about dropping a cup if you don’t hold it tight enough but the idea is the baseline is “hold the cup tight enough to have it secure in your hand under normal reasonable conditions” but our default state may be “grip it hard enough all the time so a coworker couldn’t muscle it out of your hands” or “if a door opened in your face and hit it you still hold the cup” and that is the effort - the above and beyond that you don’t need to always apply which can screw up our baseline.
Like the message is we need to be mindful of not going full throttle on everything when low or medium energy / focus / brain activation / muscle activation will do.
A strategy that is useful in our family is priming our son (~4.5 years old) for transitions from one activity to another by verbally informing him what we are going to be doing as a series of steps.
Ex:
First we will eat breakfast
Then we will brush our teeth and change clothes.
Then we will put on shoes and get in the car.
Then we will play and have fun at school.
Then daddy will pick you up.
Then we can go home and eat dinner.
Then we will (activity)
He can have pretty high anxiety and doing loops like this helps provide structure / routine and he can guess what is coming next so it doesn’t feel like a sudden rip out of time and place when switching to the next activity.
Also by talking about what comes next in the day it gives a chance to talk about anything they are worried about- like if they hear that the plan includes going to the store and they seem worried (noise, over stimulation, etc) now there’s a spot you can try to break down and talk about / reassure.
Ex:
When we drive to the store we get out of the car and into the cart.
After we get in the cart we can go get our groceries!
After we find out groceries we pay and go home and eat (good stuff, yay!)
I’m diagnosed ADHD and he shows signs of being neurodivergent as well and when we plan and talk things through it really helps bring things from high effort transitions to routine. It brings time context to those who may have difficulty with time blindness / focus as well as gives a chance to reduce surprises and talk out what happens (surprise and unknowns management).
The effort for transitions and activities has gotten way easier over time and things that used to be hard like going to the grocery have turned into exciting things (let’s go get (favorite snack!)).
Our son is also very clingy but when we cling together we do things like some adults do for anxiety like name a few things we see, name a few things we hear, but also that we are here together and we are ok.
Parenting in general and parenting kids with extra needs can be super exhausting, but the fact you are asking for ideas is showing you care and are attentive - you got this :)
Effort would be the extra strength applied past what is needed to get a reasonable grip. It is “effort” when you squeeze hard enough to bend the lid.
I see other comments talking about dropping a cup if you don’t hold it tight enough but the idea is the baseline is “hold the cup tight enough to have it secure in your hand under normal reasonable conditions” but our default state may be “grip it hard enough all the time so a coworker couldn’t muscle it out of your hands” or “if a door opened in your face and hit it you still hold the cup” and that is the effort - the above and beyond that you don’t need to always apply which can screw up our baseline.
Like the message is we need to be mindful of not going full throttle on everything when low or medium energy / focus / brain activation / muscle activation will do.