I know middle income people spending their money on craft beer on the weekend and not participating in their company 401K. Or living effectively paycheck to paycheck. They may have "disposable" income, but only in the sense that they can float emergency spending on credit.

So yeah, there's a difference, but it's one of privilege.

Bad long-term financial decisions aren't exclusive to the poor.

You grew up poor. That doesn't mean your new middle-class peers had to learn the same lessons you did. They aren't middle class because they're smarter, more disciplined or have a better work ethic. They're middle class because they were born middle class.

Wanting to improve class mobility is one thing. Blaming the poor for not doing so on their own is another.

By "being born middle class" you mean that they were taught skills that allow them to be a contributing and self sustaining member of society.

Life isn't fair but those skills can be individually learned.

No. I don't. I mean that they had the most important safety net of all: Family with the will and ability to help financially.

I'm genuinely curious what financial life lessons you think a middle class kid is learning that a poor kid doesn't understand at a much deeper level.

My own experience is that (some) middle class kids succeed despite their own failures (dropping college classes before the grade becomes part of record stands out in my mind), and then attribute their success to their superior work ethic and intellect.

If most poor people fail to move up the class ladder, then in their same situation you're just as likely to fail. It's either that, or believe yourself somehow innately superior. I can't really think of a third option. It's like the adage about being surrounded by assholes.

You're right. Life isn't fair. But that doesn't mean the person cleaning my house isn't entitled to financial stability. I'm not religious, but I can't think of a secular version of "but for the grace of God".