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AFAIK, many foreigners [read: other Asians as well as a sprinkling of non-Asians] (as well nationals from outside a city but who do business in said city) who are married have either "second wives[1]" in these alternate city offices or they have their marriages die in said places.

It has some intriguing aspects, such as the children of the "first wife" are often seen as more legitimate. Also often the wives tolerate each other. And more[2] in this abstract.

[1] in most cases it's hetero males, ergo the wives part. I believe one of the (perh former) chiefs of Foxconn [from TW] had several "second wives".

[2]journals.sagepub.com/doi/abs/10.1177/1097184X11412171



> It has some intriguing aspects, such as the children of the "first wife" are often seen as more legitimate.

My wife is Cantonese-American. Her fathers brothers, the ones who remained in Hong Kong, each had second wives. The children of the second wives aren't really considered family "publicly." They're never mentioned at family events or reunions, nor ever invited, either. When we visit Hong Kong we always carve time out to see a couple of her cousins from second wives. It was strange to me at first (as so many things are) but I've come to understand that it was very common among the older generations.

I'm not sure what's going on with her male cousins who are in Hong Kong. I've never thought to ask and don't want to pry but I am kind of curious now to know if it's being picked up by younger generations, as well. I guess in my naivety I had unconsciously assumed the practice would die out.


No, this is definitely not common in HK and is very much frowned upon among the younger generations. In fact, this is the very reason why Jackie Chan is universally hated by the younger generations here, despite his apparent popularity elsewhere.


What changed attitude-wise between the older and younger generations?


Yes, the first family has more status and usually will be the ones that get the bulk of the inherited wealth.

It seems to be sort of expected that once you reach a certain level in your business life, you will get a mistress.

This is so prevalent in the Philippines that the family law concerning whether or not you can use the last name of your father is explicitly spelled out.


Off topic: are you filipino?


I wouldn't want the last name of someone that is expected to and has a mistress regardless of their level in business... They dishonored that name.


It’s not that easy. On the one hand a name can open doors of opportunity in a place where such opportunities are fenced off, on the other hand you can have your pride but not have such opportunities. Given their status options, one can guess what choice most people would make.


It's that children wanted to be acknowledged by their fathers, or to be able to claim status similar to their "first family" half-siblings.


In the Philippines, people would think you were a massive loser if you achieved business success and didn't have mistresses.


I'd rather be considered a loser with honor than a cheater with success. I have previously declined business because of the persons extramarital affairs. If they can't respect the single most important relationship in their life, I doubt they will respect our business relationship. they are not worth doing business with.


> often the wives tolerate each other

I don't think so. They'll not fight the man, because the man is the source of money and social security. But they'll certainly fight each other, including physical battles in the parking lot.


Seems very similar to what happens to both men and women of status in other parts of the world.




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