Can you give a rough idea about how long it will take for Dendrite to be ready? I want to run a homeserver for friends, but I'd like to go straight to Dendrite and not have to deal with Synapse if possible.
it'll be a while yet. we've been focusing on hitting Matrix 1.0 by iterating on the Python codebase (Synapse) rather than diluting the effort by doing it on Dendrite in parallel. Once 1.0 is safely out the door and the first wave of post-1.0 features and perf have landed in Synapse then I suspect Dendrite will see more love.
tl;dr: Synapse is getting (much) better; i wouldn't wait for Dendrite but give Synapse a go on Py3 instead for now.
that said, once Dendrite lands, it should be 1-2 orders of magnitude more efficient by most metrics :)
FWIW, I'm running Synapse on a 1/1 instance (1 core, 1 GiB RAM) alongside a bunch of other services, with 4 active (as in: daily) users, and it works reasonably well as long as people don't join large channels (cough #matrix:matrix.org cough). That said, I'm definitely looking forward to Dendrite.