Yep, I think you're dead on. There are competing and diametrically opposed values out there, and in many cases both can be fairly argued in favor of. For example fairness vs freedom. No amount of shouting about the details will convince someone who primarily values fairness that freedom is more important, and the arguments are largely pointless unless the participants are genuinely seeking to examine the ideas, which is rarely ever the case online.

I think people understand that at a very base level, and that's why online arguments are often really more of a performance to score points with your side, or to take shots at the other side. Rarely is anyone actually attempting to convince or learn, they're just playing out some weird tribal warfare ritual and dressing it up as debate.

As the larger thread here suggests, the best move in this game is simply not to play it.