> but they will refuse to ask for help until too late.
That's because you're setting that up, perhaps inadvertently, by expecting them to figure it out and ask for help __if__ they need it. You don't even have to explicitly say that's what you expect, it's likely apparent by your demeanor.
There's something about software workplaces that discourages thinking out loud and exploring ideas. Carelessly asking the wrong question in such a place can instantly and permanently red-flag someone as incompetent. It's like people have taken the weird culture from Stackoverflow and ingrained it in their workplace.
Sure "endless" discussions or bike-shedding can be bad, but it's a much worse problem to have an environment where there's no sense of psychological safety for discussions and asking questions.
The OP article, it appears, is proposing a turgid RFC process for deciding things within one organization. That's fine, I guess, if you're a standards body coming up with rules for literally an entire industry, but it's too much for a single team. Sometimes talking things out is good as long as people can be reasonable with each other.
> There's something about software workplaces that discourages thinking out loud and exploring ideas.
I actually encourage it (or at least try). I just prefer it to be 1 on 1 (not necessarily with me), because we can’t really afford doing all of our work on a whiteboard, at some point we have to deliver. Also, I think this exercises are useful up to 3 people, then conversations quickly become too unfocused.
What I meant is that a lot of people are unable to recognize that they are stuck or very behind the schedule, and fear saying so, even if it’s not their fault.
I get it, I also had bosses who “killed the messenger”, and I’m convinced that this is in some sense a feedback loop. My point is that it’s very hard to break this loop with most people, they seem to either get it immediately or to be incapable of it, no matter how much I try.
The SO culture is actually considerably more sane, because when downvoting, you also automatically decrease your own "status" (score). Whereas in many real settings, you get +100 points if you "downvote", i.e. point out someone made a mistake.
That's because you're setting that up, perhaps inadvertently, by expecting them to figure it out and ask for help __if__ they need it. You don't even have to explicitly say that's what you expect, it's likely apparent by your demeanor.
There's something about software workplaces that discourages thinking out loud and exploring ideas. Carelessly asking the wrong question in such a place can instantly and permanently red-flag someone as incompetent. It's like people have taken the weird culture from Stackoverflow and ingrained it in their workplace.
Sure "endless" discussions or bike-shedding can be bad, but it's a much worse problem to have an environment where there's no sense of psychological safety for discussions and asking questions.
The OP article, it appears, is proposing a turgid RFC process for deciding things within one organization. That's fine, I guess, if you're a standards body coming up with rules for literally an entire industry, but it's too much for a single team. Sometimes talking things out is good as long as people can be reasonable with each other.