Uh, speaking as an american, yes, it is 100% actually a question, and yes, I do in fact want to actually know how the other person is doing. I'm fine with them leaving anything out they don't feel comfortable disclosing, but … if they do feel comfortable, it's an invitation to just cut through the nonsense and become a friend. It's the most no-nonsense way to bulldoze through the usual pointless formalities and actually get to know someone.
It's a deliberate short circuit to a real human problem - the problem of two compatible people (whether friends or lovers) being artificially delayed on connecting with each other because of "customarily enforced" protocol on how quickly they're allowed to be familiar. That problem is bad enough that it's a staple trope in rom-coms and buddy cop films - and it frequently leads to tragedy because of how short life is, and how opportunities don't last.
It feels like there are a lot of people in the american cultural milieu who've picked this up from other groups of americans (america's a huge country with tons of different culture groups), but … are missing the absolutely CRITICAL ingredient of taking it at face value.
It is exactly what it looks like; it's not facetious, it's not fake, and anyone who treats it like that is kinda cargo-culting it.
It's a deliberate short circuit to a real human problem - the problem of two compatible people (whether friends or lovers) being artificially delayed on connecting with each other because of "customarily enforced" protocol on how quickly they're allowed to be familiar. That problem is bad enough that it's a staple trope in rom-coms and buddy cop films - and it frequently leads to tragedy because of how short life is, and how opportunities don't last.
It feels like there are a lot of people in the american cultural milieu who've picked this up from other groups of americans (america's a huge country with tons of different culture groups), but … are missing the absolutely CRITICAL ingredient of taking it at face value.
It is exactly what it looks like; it's not facetious, it's not fake, and anyone who treats it like that is kinda cargo-culting it.