I'm approaching my fifth year of marriage and we have two kids under 3. My wife is a stay-at-home mom for the time being. I am pretty satisfied in my marriage even though right now, it feels it's one of the most hardest because the kids demand so much attention and a huge portion of our life is surrounded around them. To me, it seems like my wife just found another gear and is now hustling at another level with the kids. I stand in awe in how much she handles them while also putting up with me and my work (running a startup and all the emotional baggage that comes with it).
One thing that worked for us is establishing clear communication and guidelines. For example when I'm in my home-office and door is closed - it's do not disturb mode. Once I'm done with work, I take over and watch the kids while my wife rests for a bit and then it's bedtime for the kids - each of us takes a kid and put them to sleep. By 8:00 PM, both kids are asleep and its time for ourselves. We either spend it together (watching TV, etc) or apart (I play CoD, she relaxes by reading or watching her shows). We also have a mandatory at least one date a month away from the kids. This lets us to continue dating each other and enjoy each other's company.
For me, marriage is really about serving one-another every day. It's not about my happiness, desires, wants, it's about making sure my wife is satisfied and happy. My wife does the same for me. The moment you start being selfish and only try to get what you want and not work with your spouse/partner to help them achieve their dreams/wants, that's when things start to crumble.
One thing that worked for us is establishing clear communication and guidelines. For example when I'm in my home-office and door is closed - it's do not disturb mode. Once I'm done with work, I take over and watch the kids while my wife rests for a bit and then it's bedtime for the kids - each of us takes a kid and put them to sleep. By 8:00 PM, both kids are asleep and its time for ourselves. We either spend it together (watching TV, etc) or apart (I play CoD, she relaxes by reading or watching her shows). We also have a mandatory at least one date a month away from the kids. This lets us to continue dating each other and enjoy each other's company.
For me, marriage is really about serving one-another every day. It's not about my happiness, desires, wants, it's about making sure my wife is satisfied and happy. My wife does the same for me. The moment you start being selfish and only try to get what you want and not work with your spouse/partner to help them achieve their dreams/wants, that's when things start to crumble.