The point of a commuter train is to get to work. On time. Reliably. People freak the fuck out when they're going to be 5-10 minutes late due to any kind of service issue, because even if they know it wasn't their fault, their boss will assume it was (and most people who take public transit have bosses). You can outfit the trains with fine linens and couches instead of seats but being late to work in the morning will never be "relaxing" or "comfortable."
PT being regularly late is definitely a reason people avoid it, hence my suggesting we focus on service reliability and comfort. I'm not proposing we make PT slower than it already is - just that the focus needn't be on mean travel time. So the average PT consumer may need to leave their house a little earlier but would virtually always get where they're going on time (stress-free and in comfort), vs the current situation where you might fairly often be considerably late.
which means your experience was not similar to a commuter's, at all