I definitely do this a lot. I would say I’m somewhat self-centred, but not a sociopath!
I think I just make a connection with what they’re saying and then share my experience to commiserate, and to find wisdom/learnings from that experience to see if they apply.
That’s my conscious assessment anyway. But I feel like I shouldn’t do it.
Anyone have tips to avoid this? How do I prevent myself from relating their experience to my own?
I feel that being able to completely ignore your own experience (or even opinion) and adapt purely to what they need at this moment is true selflessness, and it’s something I’ve always struggled with.
I'm not sure if there really is true selflessness. I think, for example, for me to even understand what's happening in this text exchange, I'm trying to imagine how you interpret the words while also recalling how I interpret the words and comparing the two. I'm trying to imagine how you're feeling, while also paying attention to how I'm feeling.
It just seems to be a pretty constant (if not always there) comparison and harmonization.
In other words, how are we supposed to understand the world without relating it to our experience?
I think I just make a connection with what they’re saying and then share my experience to commiserate, and to find wisdom/learnings from that experience to see if they apply.
That’s my conscious assessment anyway. But I feel like I shouldn’t do it.
Anyone have tips to avoid this? How do I prevent myself from relating their experience to my own?
I feel that being able to completely ignore your own experience (or even opinion) and adapt purely to what they need at this moment is true selflessness, and it’s something I’ve always struggled with.
(Ironic comment I know).