The few places I've worked in (some small, some largish - 2500+ people) - I've never worked anywhere more than 22 months, so ... there's not always a long time to develop relationships. But... coming in, there are already relationships, sometimes going back years, between people, and it's not easy breaking in to those, or fitting in at all. Without even trying (or specifically because they're not trying), well intentioned managers end up playing 'favorites' with some, which has seemed to exacerbate the issue of 'insiders' vs 'outsiders'.
> I get the feeling that people don’t actually want to be managed that way.
As someone who has gone in and out of engineering management over the years I actually kind of wish this were true as it's the part I enjoy the least. I don't know if it's a generation thing or the times or whatever but I've found it's very much an increasing trend. My job becomes more therapist than anything else.
>> understanding their hopes & desires, steering them towards growth
> people don’t actually want to be managed that way.
That is not management, per se. It is a way to try to extract more value from employees outside of the business. More often than not, documentaion (ie quarterly reviews) is weaponized when cuts are being made. This is by desgn.
If something is not a reliable tool for making their job better, engineers will choose to avoid wasting work time with it.
I’ve learned not to mention that, here, as it often results in fairly insulting attacks.
I get the feeling that people don’t actually want to be managed that way.