The best arrangement I've witnessed (for family friends from my hometown) was a private funeral for the close family members, followed 6 weeks later by a memorial service in a nice rented space with a slideshow going, drinks, and a general air of a big reunion.

The large amount of time between the two events was better for the family, who didn't feel the same sting of fresh grief. There was no awkwardness, either. Everyone could remember the deceased in a way that she would have appreciated - old memories, laughter, and positivity.