A weird case on photography is dating. Apparently absolutely flawless professional-grade photos are entirely mandatory for men, and heavy depth of field is a hard requirement.
It comes off as total nonsense to me. Smartphone pictures of people look great to me and depth of field isn't something I give a shit about on a dating profile, in fact in any picture I'd prefer to be able to check out the background details. But I apparently live on a different planet from the people judging these photos. Even as a bi person I can't empathize at all with these fellow androphiles who apparently vomit and convulse at the sight of an unblurred background in a profile picture.
So it's one case where the fine details absolutely matter to outcome, even if the women on the other end may have a hard time articulating what's better about one photo than another.
(God, being a man with a dating profile is so exhausting - where has our species gone that something like this guide with millions of words is required for men to be successful? Wasn't there a time they could just be themselves? I'm eternally grateful I don't have to play that game anymore now that I'm in a great relationship.)
> from the evidence, you need to be a highly skilled photographer with expensive equipment and perfect photos to get responses on those apps
I don't know, I'm not in the market... But if you want to learn what it takes to "score a date", going to a website called "killyourinnerloser" where a guy describes how he has all the sex and threesomes and foursomes and knows how to please all women, posts a bunch of erotic/pornographic material, and literally asks for $1 to change your life is very much like going to an actual porn site to learn what it takes to satisfy a woman.
Not showing your dirty dishes or toilet in the background, and not taking pictures in the dark is common sense. No need for macho photographer to tell you how to sex the ladies.
But let me put your mind at ease further. I needed a chuckle and read the mistakes to avoid, together with his own fine example of nine winning pics. In no particular order:
- Don't wear the same clothes in multiple pics. Proceeds to wear the exact same sweatshirt and gold chain in no less than four pics in different settings, even restaurant and gym because it's his "everywhere" sweatshirt. Then wears the exact same overall outfit in another two pictures. Then the same cap in two pictures.
- Don't be too far away or bad angle. Posts a picture with his back to the camera in which he is ~1-2% of the whole frame.
- No staged or stiff pose and definitely no static posture. Posts three pics with the exact same blank and stiff facial expression and static posture. All but one picture look extremely staged poses.
It has always historically been that significant portion of males don't find a mate and there is a small percentage who get many, just because of the status, hierarchy, etc. So men have always needed to outcompete each other. With so little material in dating apps to compete with, these details will matter so much. Having professional photos also implies a lot of desirable qualities about you, like you had money and wisdom to do that in the first place.
It's weird because when I see super polished professional photos on a dating profile, I feel like I'm looking at a stock photo or an advertisement, not a genuine person on my level. I don't even find those pictures inherently pleasing, if anything I have an urge to skip over them immediately in the same way I've been subconsciously trained to skip over ads on a website without adblock.
It comes off as total nonsense to me. Smartphone pictures of people look great to me and depth of field isn't something I give a shit about on a dating profile, in fact in any picture I'd prefer to be able to check out the background details. But I apparently live on a different planet from the people judging these photos. Even as a bi person I can't empathize at all with these fellow androphiles who apparently vomit and convulse at the sight of an unblurred background in a profile picture.
Alas, from the evidence, you need to be a highly skilled photographer with expensive equipment and perfect photos to get responses on those apps: https://killyourinnerloser.com/why-your-tinder-pictures-suck... https://killyourinnerloser.com/inspiration/
So it's one case where the fine details absolutely matter to outcome, even if the women on the other end may have a hard time articulating what's better about one photo than another.
(God, being a man with a dating profile is so exhausting - where has our species gone that something like this guide with millions of words is required for men to be successful? Wasn't there a time they could just be themselves? I'm eternally grateful I don't have to play that game anymore now that I'm in a great relationship.)