Walking around making constant negative judgments about the intelligence of your peers is hardly a good way to get along.
I posit that this is mostly due to the very incomplete first-hand/direct understanding most of us have of intelligence. Most of us only know one or several slim slices of intelligence. This may make it very hard for us to recognize intelligence in another.
I am reminded of an encounter with the clerk at the comic book store the day before yesterday. He was trying to make me out like I was some sort of illiterate because I didn't know who everyone in the League of Extraordinary Gentlemen was. (I know the major characters only.) As it so happens, much of my interest is in music and not literature, but I am sometimes moved by literature. He seemed positively smug that only he was curious enough to Google all the minor characters.
One thing that I might say -- it seems that a degree of "emotional intelligence" might have tremendous leverage -- it may well help you find others who are intelligent in novel and interesting ways.
Another situation from the past week -- there's a woman in one of the jam sessions I go to, who's just a terrible drummer! She has no sense of rhythm, except to approximate the beat with random and inappropriate errors. (Which totally wipes out the wonderful push-pull on the rhythm that the really good musicians are trying to share with each other.) It's like she's an incontinent with no sense of smell, inured to everyone's teeth-gritting tolerance of her. Well, there's a definite "flow" to socializing, and many different styles. It's advisable to either learn the particular "flow" of your group, or find another one more to your liking.
I posit that this is mostly due to the very incomplete first-hand/direct understanding most of us have of intelligence. Most of us only know one or several slim slices of intelligence. This may make it very hard for us to recognize intelligence in another.
I am reminded of an encounter with the clerk at the comic book store the day before yesterday. He was trying to make me out like I was some sort of illiterate because I didn't know who everyone in the League of Extraordinary Gentlemen was. (I know the major characters only.) As it so happens, much of my interest is in music and not literature, but I am sometimes moved by literature. He seemed positively smug that only he was curious enough to Google all the minor characters.
One thing that I might say -- it seems that a degree of "emotional intelligence" might have tremendous leverage -- it may well help you find others who are intelligent in novel and interesting ways.
Another situation from the past week -- there's a woman in one of the jam sessions I go to, who's just a terrible drummer! She has no sense of rhythm, except to approximate the beat with random and inappropriate errors. (Which totally wipes out the wonderful push-pull on the rhythm that the really good musicians are trying to share with each other.) It's like she's an incontinent with no sense of smell, inured to everyone's teeth-gritting tolerance of her. Well, there's a definite "flow" to socializing, and many different styles. It's advisable to either learn the particular "flow" of your group, or find another one more to your liking.