I know you're just being glib, but here are some answers:
* build doesn't mean compile
* you can compile your build process and then use that to actually run your build
* the benefits of typed languages go beyond catching errors at compile time
There are tools like ocamlbuild and cabal, which are implemented in Ocaml and Haskell, and used to build Ocaml and Haskell.
But ocamlbuild doesn't have a build file. It just knows how to build Ocaml. And build Ocaml is about all it can do. Cabal is powered by a .cabal file, which is a data structure, and a Setup.hs file, which is run like a shell script via runhaskell.
I think what tikhonj envisions would be a lot of work to achieve. Maybe he already knows that. I suspect that the closest most of us will ever get is putting something like this at the top of a Makefile :)
