For what it's worth, I was a very late bloomer (held back by severe depression and isolation, etc. all through my teens and twenties), going between throwaway jobs and wasting time in school.
Only in my very late 20s and early 30s did I start to seriously reevaluate my life and career, and made a series of major life changes (moving, practicing social skills, exercising more, developing new interests), etc. In the process, through my 30s, I ended up moving jobs and locations many times, nearly moved to another country at one point, picked up a bunch of new hobbies and friendships along the way... it's never too late to start (or keep) growing in novel ways. Nearly 40 now, and the happiest (and most balanced) I've ever been.
I think it also gave me a lot of perspective in terms of seeing what other people struggle with, whether they're working retail in their 30s, or maybe materially successful but going through a tragic divorce, or too self-absorbed to realize how much they push people away, or fighting severe drug and alcohol addiction... and so forth. Each person's story is their own and your journey doesn't need to be measured by any timeline but your own.
> I think this (peaceful acceptance) is the one I struggle the most with.
Yeah, that's a hard one for sure! For some people, meditation and/or mindfulness can help. Or yoga. Or religion. For me, none of that really did much good personally (too skeptical/agnostic for most of it), but what really helped me was spending time in nature, purposely without electronics and frequently without books, etc. Just hiking or swimming or biking or whatever, both for the exercise and the time for observation and self-reflection.
Anyway, I'm not going to do the whole "do what I did and it'll work" spiel lol. It never works like that... people are way too different, and our backgrounds and dreams are likely too different.
But I will say this: You're searching. That's a HUGE part of it. It might take you a while to find what you're looking for, but at least you've started looking and are preparing yourself for the journey. A lot of people just kinda... drift... into life situations without much intent, living moment to moment for better or worse. To live an intentional, purposeful life is a much more difficult (but arguably more rewarding) pursuit, IMHO. It's going to be uphill for a bit, but you'll feel a lot better once you've started the climb and can see where you came up from...
Only in my very late 20s and early 30s did I start to seriously reevaluate my life and career, and made a series of major life changes (moving, practicing social skills, exercising more, developing new interests), etc. In the process, through my 30s, I ended up moving jobs and locations many times, nearly moved to another country at one point, picked up a bunch of new hobbies and friendships along the way... it's never too late to start (or keep) growing in novel ways. Nearly 40 now, and the happiest (and most balanced) I've ever been.
I think it also gave me a lot of perspective in terms of seeing what other people struggle with, whether they're working retail in their 30s, or maybe materially successful but going through a tragic divorce, or too self-absorbed to realize how much they push people away, or fighting severe drug and alcohol addiction... and so forth. Each person's story is their own and your journey doesn't need to be measured by any timeline but your own.
> I think this (peaceful acceptance) is the one I struggle the most with.
Yeah, that's a hard one for sure! For some people, meditation and/or mindfulness can help. Or yoga. Or religion. For me, none of that really did much good personally (too skeptical/agnostic for most of it), but what really helped me was spending time in nature, purposely without electronics and frequently without books, etc. Just hiking or swimming or biking or whatever, both for the exercise and the time for observation and self-reflection.
Anyway, I'm not going to do the whole "do what I did and it'll work" spiel lol. It never works like that... people are way too different, and our backgrounds and dreams are likely too different.
But I will say this: You're searching. That's a HUGE part of it. It might take you a while to find what you're looking for, but at least you've started looking and are preparing yourself for the journey. A lot of people just kinda... drift... into life situations without much intent, living moment to moment for better or worse. To live an intentional, purposeful life is a much more difficult (but arguably more rewarding) pursuit, IMHO. It's going to be uphill for a bit, but you'll feel a lot better once you've started the climb and can see where you came up from...
I believe in you :)